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  • Heard in the Dare House

  • Anna"Daddy? Are you numbers eternity? I heard that they were..."
  • Anna"Huh? Craig has a list?"
  • Pete"Dad, did you know Lucille Ball was married to a famous singer and performer?"
    Dad"Yep, Ricky Ricardo"
    Pete"Yeah, but...Hmmm..I can't remember what she called him..."
    Josh"Rick?"

  • Anna"Naomi, can you look at your calendar with your eyes closed?"
    Naomi"No. No one can, silly."
    Anna"Chuck Norris can!!"

  • Anna [dragging her by the hand]"Naomi! Come here! I want to..experience something!!"
  • Mom"Thanks to Naomi, who passed her headache on to me."
    Naomi"Pastor Headache? Who's Pastor Headache?!"

  • Dad: “Guys?! I can play music from my phone through the van's sound system!!.”
    Kids: “No way! Play your ringtones!!”

  • Darefamily: “Night, Pete. Night, Naomi. Night, Mom. Night, Dad...”
    Anna: “Night, vision!”

  • Josh:"Pete! You're a brutal victim!!"
  • Anna: “Wow Mom, you look so fragile.......expealadocious!”
  • Anna: “Dad, do you believe in Santa?”
    Dad: “Sure, St. Nicholas was at the council of Nicea. He punched Arius in the mouth for his heresy…”
    Anna: “Hmmmm…I don’t remember seeing that in the video…”

  • Josh: (seeing an old faded Doritos delivery truck) "No cheese Doritos? Who would even want those??!"
  • Naomi: [Looking at a crafting book]"That looks like denim...is that denim?"
    Anna: "WHO's DENIM?!"

  • Dad: "OK. I'm going to read the passage that Pastor Rick is going to preach from tomorrow..."
    Anna: "Ooh. You'll just ruin it."

  • Pete: "Did you guys know that some people lose their adult teeth and grow a whole new third set?"
    Mom: "Yeah. They're called sharks."
    Josh: "No! They're called hockey players!"

  • Dad: "Josh, have you ever heard of Alexander the Great?"
    Josh:"Oh yeah. He did a bunch of crazy things. He jumped in a river with a bunch...
    Wait. That was Houdini."

  • Pete: "Josh, you know what the Pope is, right?"
    Josh: "Yeah. The stuff in the orange juice."

  • Pete: [after mowing the lawn and getting a glass of water from Josh]"Thanks for the water Josh..."
    Josh: "That's what brothers are for."

  • Anna: "Yeah! Let's get this starty parted!....Errrr...."
  • Paul: Why don't we ever eat at Long John Silvers, honey?
    Jen: Cuz' it's gross.
    Paul: Come on, I was expecting something better than that.
    Jen: OK, I don't want to die.
    Paul: Oh, is it in a bad part of town?
    Jen: Nope. Just a bad part of the food chain.
    (Paul: HAHAHAAHAHHAHHHAAAA)

  • Josh [While explaining an upcoming medical procedure to Josh]:"What?! You get to go find some radioactive and eat it?!"
  • Josh"Bummer Mom, you're not ticklish. But I can still hurt you, because your nervous system is working!"
  • Josh"Yeah, I want a massage. But I want a professional to do it!"
  • Josh"Hey Dad, do you need your cell phone charged?"
    Dad"Nope."
    Josh"OK. If you do, just call me."

  • Naomi"Mom, Dad's stomach may be empty but you're a feast for his eyes!"
  • Josh"Sorry Grandma, I don't really like antiques...unless they have up to date stuff."
  • Anna [After watching several rounds of chess]:"Chex Mix! I win!!"
  • Pete:"Can we watch old home videos?!"
    Anna:"Yeah! Can we watch homeless videos?!!!"

  • Naomi:"I'm not sure what I'm more afraid of, a whale or a shark, 'cuz I know how to fight a shark, 'cuz they're really weak in the eyes..."
  • Josh: "Mom, even if you were deformed, you'd still be beautiful"
  • Peter: "Hey, remember that time when Josh had...that.....thing called...pig...latin, or something?"
    Mom and Dad: "Swine Flu??!!!!"
    Peter: "Oh yeah....swine flu..."

  • Anna: "Naomi, when is Abraham Lincoln's birthday?"
    Naomi: [Showing her on the calendar]"Right...here. But, he's not alive anymore."
    Anna: "Awe, that's sad. Cuz he's gonna miss his birthday."

  • Anna: "Man, Mom. You're making Dad do everything!"
    Pete: Yeah, Anna. That's how a real marriage works. Haven't you ever read the comic 'The Lockhorns'?""

  • Kindle case – highly recommend!

    Just received my case for my Kindle touch in the mail today!  I was worried a bit about its quality as it was coming from an Amazon seller (not Amazon direct), from outside the US and because there are about a billion case options out there so I knew I was taking a risk deciding on anything.  But I can say that I’m highly satisfied with this thing -

    It’s genuine leather which was a surprise given the cheaper price.

    Best part is the nice built-in stand as part of the case.  Looks like it will sit nicely on my car’s dashboard and will really help when I’m driving and reading.

    The magnets seem strong enough to hold it closed and overall, it didn’t seem too heavy to hold while reading.  I bought it from HERE and ordered it on 1/9/12 and got it today (1/17).  Not bad considering it came from the U.K.

    If you have a touch, I’d recommend this case.  No light on this one, but I didn’t really want one and all the reviews of cases with lights were unimpressive.  This will keep my wife’s awesome Christmas gift to me safe and make me look all professional when I walk into my next staff meeting (while I read Ben Franklin’s autobiography).

    -paul

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