this is awesome. i keep forgetting to post it and it happened on Mother’s Day.
our pastor was talking about mom’s. he was referencing how moms have this ability to do some amazing things. you know what i mean,…things like functioning on 30 mins of sleep after being up with a baby all night, cooking more than one thing at a time for dinner, being ready with a puke bucket before it hits the floor (well, that one only happens sometimes…ask me about our trip to Florida sometime), catching kids before they fall all the way to the floor from a table top, etc.
joshua was sitting right next to me. he was listening intently and hanging on Pastor Rick’s every word. then Rick says, “moms can do some pretty amazing, spooky stuff.” joshua looks at me with HUGE eyes and says,” yeah, like fit an entire sloppy joe in their mouth in ONE BITE!!!”
oh yeah. joshua has heard the story of how when i first was dating my husband, i bet him and a few other people that i could fit an entire sloppy joe in my mouth and eat it in one bite. we are talking full-sized, falling apart, sloppy joe. i was not standing in front of a mirror when i did it but i am pretty sure that it was beyond disgusting to watch. but hey, i got $9 so was it worth it? um, no. not if that is all i am considered amazing for.
sorry honey. you married a pig and the only amazing thing that my kid could come up with was that i have a big mouth. oh, and i am a gambler. man, i gotta get some better stories. between that one and the one where i had a dead minnow in my teeth (don’t ask. i was too young to know better. like 12 or something…) i swear my kids will think i used to be a boy. either that or they will wonder why in the world their dad picked this lady to be their momma. cuz if one of my kids did that with a sloppy joe, i’d probably body-check them.
happy mothers day.
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