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  • Heard in the Dare House

  • Naomi"Mom, isn't the Charleston that dance on that show Fresh Prince...or....?"
  • Pete"We should all act out a Shakespeare play. Maybe Macbeth?"
    Anna "Oh! I want to play MacMeth!"

  • Josh"Owe! I bit my tongue!"
    Mom "That's not part of dinner, dude."
    Josh"I know. That's why I didn't bite it off, Michael Tyson"

  • Dad "Josh, do you know who Mike Tyson bit?"
    Josh"Uuuhh...yeah...like... Leonard Skimmer?"

  • Anna [When we were all talking about love languages, Dad explains how you can change over your life]"Oh yeah, totally. 'Cause I used to be into drawing."
  • Anna [after falling off her bike]"I'm OK! I don't need the arcade kit!"
  • Dad [Getting ready to give a gift to the girls for their piano recital]"Alright girls, we're going to do something that's long overdue."
    Anna "Ha. Probably taxes..."

  • Josh [After reading Peter's sign that said, "DJ takes requests, and tips] "Hey. I have a tip for you. If people don't like the song you're playing, you should change it."
  • Anna "Sometimes I look around and think, I am Anna...and these are other people..."
  • Josh "Listen. You give me the Simon's Quest code and I'll shop in the women's section!"
  • Josh "You smell like an air freshener, Mom."
    Dad "oh Josh those are kind of cheap so that sounds like you’re kind of insulting Mom when you say that."
    Josh "MMMMmmmm…you smell like a $100 air freshener."

  • Anna "Mom. Where’s the first Bible ever. Like ever."
    Mom "Ummm, I’m not sure. But maybe you could ask Dad about that"
    Anna "Well. I was gonna, but I didn’t want to get a whole sermon…so I asked you"

  • Dad "Hmm. These chips taste stale."
    Mom "They're not stale. They're just from Aldi."

  • Naomi "Look Mom! My foot is bigger than Anna's whole face!"
  • Peter [Interrupting Mom quizzing Naomi on Science by asking, "What's inside the membrane of a cell?"] "...Insane?"
  • Anna [Seeing Almonso Wilder grab Laura Ingles' engagement ring from the kitchen on Little House] "Hmph. He just grabbed a chill pill."
  • Josh "Dad, my grammar book must be in labor. It keeps talking about contractions"
  • Josh [After Dad picked a crumb off Josh's shirt]"Dad, you're like a parasite, cleaning me."
  • Anna[Watching Dorothy's friends break her out of the wicked witch's castle]: "Well. That's why you always keep your axe with ya."
  • Josh: "I wonder if there are any tornadoes at the campground we're going to."
    Anna: "Yes. There are. I know. I checked on E-Bay."

  • Mom: "Mmmm, Josh. You smell really good. Are you wearing cologne?"
    Josh: "Wait. My.....Clone Trooper, you mean?"

  • Mom: "I delivered all four of these kids. The least they can do is let me have the rest of the dill pickle potato chips!"
  • Josh: "You're a weak-aholic!"
    Dad: "A weakaholic?!"
    Josh: "Yeah. You're addicted to being weak!"

  • Dad: [After listening to the long piano intro to Chicago's Does anybody really know what time it is?] "I don't like that dissident music. It's all crazy and off time."
    Anna: "I like it! 'Cuz that's how I play!"

  • Paul: "So according to this book kids, who shot JFK?"
    Josh: "Lee Elvis Hardwell?"

  • Paul: "How Many Kings by Downhere is a perfect running song. The beat is just my pace."
    Jen: "Oh yeah? My song is Canon in D."

  • Anna[while washing herself in the shower]: "Hmmmmm. Arms are helpful."
  • Anna [Seeing Mom running water in the kitchen sink]: "Hey! You want to pay bills?!"
    Mom: "Huh?"
    Anna: "You're wasting!"

  • Josh: "Mom, can I play Mario?"
    Mom: "No Josh. Today is craft day. We're doing stuff for someone."
    Josh: "Yeah. I was gonna beat the game for Dad."

  • Anna: [Laying in bed, in a depressed voice]"Naomi, what do I do with life?"
    Naomi: "Uhh...how about you go to sleep?"

  • Mom: "Weird, I've always heard that song differently. But hey, what am I?"
    Anna: "A human being!"

  • Anna: [After being told to eat her dinner]"Mom, I took two bites! You can see the ground!"
  • Josh: "Man, I want to go to a casino."
    Mom: "What?!"
    Josh: "Wait. Is casino the same as gazebo?"

  • Jen to the kids: "Guys, don't forget toppings for your salad. The more colors on your salad, the better it is for you."
    Josh: "Even if it has Superman ice cream on it?!"

  • Anna"Huh? Craig has a list?"
  • Anna"Naomi, can you look at your calendar with your eyes closed?"
    Naomi"No. No one can, silly."
    Anna"Chuck Norris can!!"

  • Mom"Thanks to Naomi, who passed her headache on to me."
    Naomi"Pastor Headache? Who's Pastor Headache?!"

  • Darefamily: “Night, Pete. Night, Naomi. Night, Mom. Night, Dad...”
    Anna: “Night, vision!”

  • Anna: “Dad, do you believe in Santa?”
    Dad: “Sure, St. Nicholas was at the council of Nicea. He punched Arius in the mouth for his heresy…”
    Anna: “Hmmmm…I don’t remember seeing that in the video…”

  • Pete: "Josh, you know what the Pope is, right?"
    Josh: "Yeah. The stuff in the orange juice."

  • Anna: "Yeah! Let's get this starty parted!"
  • Josh"Bummer Mom, you're not ticklish. But I can still hurt you, because your nervous system is working!"
  • Josh"Sorry Grandma, I don't really like antiques...unless they have up to date stuff."
  • Naomi:"I'm not sure what I'm more afraid of, a whale or a shark, 'cuz I know how to fight a shark, 'cuz they're really weak in the eyes..."
  • perfect peace

    i have a sick kid.  it is josh.  i think it is strep throat.  and to echo what Josh said to me this morning, “God is so nice”.  (no, i am not saying that sarcastically)  let me explain…

    yesterday was a bit of a crummy day.  i had stuff weighing on my mind and let it get the best of me.  my sweet husband tried his hardest to cheer me up and encourage me but i was making it difficult.  i went to bed with a pounding headache and was totally exhausted and defeated.

    then today hit.  6:15 this morning and josh was crying his head off.  paul went into the boys’ room to see josh sitting on the side of his bed with pete next to him trying to comfort him (awwwww…)  josh had a nightmare and was scared.  daddy talked with him and got both boys back in bed.  when they got up for the day about an hour later, joshy was not himself.  laying around with a headache and a belly ache and just feeling not himself.  now anyone who knows me knows that a day starting like that will usually send me over the edge- fast.  i HATE when my  kids are sick (i.e. have potential to vomit) and i stress about it way more than i ever should.  but today was a little different.   i felt calmer and way more peaceful about the whole thing.  as i was heading to the shower, i thought about that.  why was it different today?

    the Lord brought to mind Isaiah 26:3 “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.”

    that was the key.  after a rough day yesterday, i knew i could not do that again today.  this morning before i even got out of bed, i confessed my sins of frustration, anger, impatience, lack of trust, and general crankiness.  then i asked the Lord to please help me today to trust in Him and give me the strength to obey and honor Him.  that is the only way i have not flipped out.  it is because of Him and His promise to me.

    to my shame, i do not do this nearly enough.  and i will probably do this again before the day is done.   i could probably do it hourly.  BUT that is the wonderful thing about the Lord: He will forgive me every time.  how do i know that?  He says it in His Word.

    Psalm 51 is wonderful and i always am encouraged by verse 17:  “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.”

    i didn’t necessarily have a broken heart this morning- but yesterday i did.  and i talked to the Lord about it while i was lying in bed trying to fall asleep.  and this morning i was contrite and laid it all before Him.  what did He give me?  a sick kid and cold air and flurries.  and for that i am thankful.  people think that peace comes with everything working out and problems disappearing.  that is not peace.  peace is that calmness in  your spirit during the trials and stresses in life.  without josh being sick, would i have seen so clearly the difference HE makes in me?  maybe, maybe not.  but i am glad that He used that to get my attention and keep my focus on Him.

    most days, my focus can be found on a song, a movie i recently watched or a tv show i am looking forward to, a project i am working on or want to start, or the disagreement with someone, or the food i need to make for dinner, etc., etc., etc…

    today my mind will be stayed on Him.  i need His perfect peace to rule my day.

    jen

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    2 Responses

    1. Wow. HE IS OUR PEACE! (Ephesians 2:14) Wonderful story, honey! My favorite part:

      “…people think that peace comes with everything working out and problems disappearing. that is not peace. peace is that calmness in your spirit during the trials and stresses in life. ”

      Amen!
      -paul

    2. Good stuff. Thanks for sharing. God is so nice, isn’t He? Even in spite of ourselves. : ) Feel better, Josh. Praying for ya, buddy.

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